Alan Stokes – over 30 and still stylin
Image source: Animal
All fine if: you’re skinny, happy to be hated and want to look like a trucker’s love child.
Tragically uncool
If you’re over 30, do not attempt to wear the same clothes as surfers ten years younger than you. You will look tragically uncool.
Most people when they pass 30 years of age, have an office job, kids or an alcohol issue. Possibly all 3.
Which means you’re probably:
• carrying more weight than you used to.
• still trying to wear the same wardrobe from your twenties.
• desperately trying to maintain a cool surfer look.
Sure you can get fitter, lose weight, surf more, buy a new wardrobe. But before you do, consider the following:
Just say no
Don’t be that person
Image source: Chuckography
But it’s time to kick the habit and just say no to:
• Bead and shell necklaces
So they have sentimental value, because you got them when you were travelling the world in your early twenties. Now you look lost in time.
As Esquire magazine say “Male jewelry should be discreet, classy, and preferably made from something that doesn’t float”.
• Skate shoes
Swollen tongues and wideboy laces were cool and comfy when grinding the streets on your skateboard as a careless kid.
Today even skateboarders opt for sleeker Vans style shoes. So lay those botox injected trainers to rest.
• Wife beaters
A crisp, clean white singlet on a muscular young torso is the epitome of an athletic look.
An over-stretched, stained vest on a jelly-bellied middle-aged man screams ‘wife beater’.
• Trucker caps
On a young fit surfer, trucker caps are slightly ironic. The large cap fronts are designed to be billboards for brands.
Unless you’re a young or professional surfer, trucker caps just make you look like a trucker.
Volcom flying high?
Image source: Volcom
• Massive logos and inappropriate slogans
As a youngster you’re proud to be able to afford a designer surf garment, therefore happy to display the oversized logo across your chest. Drug and sex related slogans seem funny, when you’ve had little experience of either.
As an adult you really should know better. You are not a walking billboard and ‘flyin high’ t-shirts won’t help you get a promotion.
• Super slim fit
Every kid I see today is wearing trousers so tight, you must need lube to get them off. Even those smart fitted shirts, which seem sensible enough, are only suitable for the malnourished.
The dangers of middle aged men and women, attempting to climb aboard the slim fit train, are immediately evident. These garments should come with a health warning like ‘this garment will explode on impact’.
• Swimwear
Skimpy bikinis and butt hugging boardies are fine if you have a Baywatch body.
If you’re over 30 there’s a high chance your body should not be over exposed.
Cool surf fashion over 30
Super cool ladies surf wear
Image source: Neon Wetsuits
In fact, surf brands are designing collections with the more mature surfer.
Makes sense if you think about it. We are surfing for longer, we have more disposable income and we still want to look like surfers. Cha-ching.
The mantra for cool surf fashion when you’re over 30 is: keep it classic and simple.
• Jewelry
In my opinion men’s jewelry should start and finish with a quality divers watch. If under extreme pressure, a simple wedding ring can be forgiven.
Personally I think jewelry is completely unnecessary. Unless you’re a woman, you can do whatever you want. You are beautiful.
• Beyond flip flops
You no longer need to live in flip flops to keep your feet aired and comfy.
Lightweight breathable materials and slip on designs, mean you can cover up and keep cool with ease. Like the latest laid back Cushe Getaway shoes.
Laid back and air cooled shoes
Image source: Cushe footwear
• Castro caps or snug beanies
Need to keep the sun off? A classic Castro cap will keep your balding barnet protected in style.
Need to keep your noggin warm? Then a simple beany will do the job, but keep it plain and snug fitting. Those big baggy ones are for people with long hair or dreadlocks only.
• New t-shirts
Traumatic as it maybe, you need to bin those 15 year old freebie surf mag t-shirts.
Invest in new ones with discreet logos and simple, inoffensive designs. My current favourite t-shirt depicts a lion surfing on a feather by the Wave Project charity.
• Sensible swimwear
There are many high tech, low vis designs out there. Meaning you can get practical, classic styles without having to shop at the same stores as your parents.
Check out Animal’s Darwin collection for high tech board shorts in classic designs.
For the ladies there are some amazing swimsuit/wetsuits out there from the likes of Neon Wetsuits.
It’s true, I’m no fashion guru. I have committed many of the crimes detailed above.
But if you’re over 30 and want respect from your partner and children, smarten up!
Nice article. RipaQuikBong focus too much on the under 30’s.
I live in an iconic Australian surf town where the average age of the surfer (and we know how to surf) is 35+. This average is brought higher by the numerous “mature” surfers in the.line up.
Here, we surf ’til we die.
I agree tiwh teverything you’ve said. In particular, loose the logos and go for understated personal style.
Hi Peter, thanks for taking time to comment.
Love the comment ‘surf till we die’, might have to use that!
I’m guessing you live in Torquay? Cheers
Hi Peter, thanks for taking time to comment.
Love the comment ‘surf till we die’, might have to use that!
I’m guessing you live in Torquay? Cheers
Nice article. RipaQuikBong focus too much on the under 30’s.
I live in an iconic Australian surf town where the average age of the surfer (and we know how to surf) is 35+. This average is brought higher by the numerous “mature” surfers in the.line up.
Here, we surf ’til we die.
I agree tiwh teverything you’ve said. In particular, loose the logos and go for understated personal style.
Surf shops have become more about fashion than actual surfing – I’ve seen them in all sorts of outback towns here. That’s not such a bad thing, mind you; it’s business I guess. But the business I’m in nowadays (organic surf wax currently crowdfunding to test its shark-deterring ability) makes me irritated with the lack of care or awareness being shown by retailers who badge themselves as surf-oriented.
For instance – wetsuits. You find one that isn’t too cool for school Black…the absurd seal costumes that fill the racks; for MEN that is…the girls, the kids – they get all the colours, the high contrast; the stuff sharks hate. I had to visit 8 different surf shops on Sydney’s northern beaches to get the one I’ve got; a Peak with some high-viz green highlights. And I always wear a bright vest with it – the more lines, the more contrast, the better. But what you look like is the last reason the shark’s in your vicinity…don’t start me…check out https://www.facebook.com/commonsensesurf/ for the discussion.
Hi Neil,
Shark repelling wetsuits or wax isn’t something many people consider in Cornwall. However considering many of us wonder the globe in search of surf, we really should give it more thought. Thanks for the comment. Cheers
Hi Neil,
Shark repelling wetsuits or wax isn’t something many people consider in Cornwall. However considering many of us wonder the globe in search of surf, we really should give it more thought. Thanks for the comment. Cheers
Surf shops have become more about fashion than actual surfing – I’ve seen them in all sorts of outback towns here. That’s not such a bad thing, mind you; it’s business I guess. But the business I’m in nowadays (organic surf wax currently crowdfunding to test its shark-deterring ability) makes me irritated with the lack of care or awareness being shown by retailers who badge themselves as surf-oriented.
For instance – wetsuits. You find one that isn’t too cool for school Black…the absurd seal costumes that fill the racks; for MEN that is…the girls, the kids – they get all the colours, the high contrast; the stuff sharks hate. I had to visit 8 different surf shops on Sydney’s northern beaches to get the one I’ve got; a Peak with some high-viz green highlights. And I always wear a bright vest with it – the more lines, the more contrast, the better. But what you look like is the last reason the shark’s in your vicinity…don’t start me…check out https://www.facebook.com/commonsensesurf/ for the discussion.
Hi there, I found your site quite by accident and was checking out some of your musings and 15 minutes later I end up here, reading this article – and loved this bit:
“Personally I think jewelry is completely unnecessary. Unless you’re a woman, you can do whatever you want. You are beautiful.” Swooned a bit just then.
Love your site and I didn’t know all of those things about Kelly Slater. I feel a void has now been filled. 🙂
Au Revoir!
Thanks for taking the time to comment. It always feels good to know wonderful people like you have read and enjoyed my words.
Tu es belle!
Thanks for taking the time to comment. It always feels good to know wonderful people like you have read and enjoyed my words.
Tu es belle!
Hi there, I found your site quite by accident and was checking out some of your musings and 15 minutes later I end up here, reading this article – and loved this bit:
“Personally I think jewelry is completely unnecessary. Unless you’re a woman, you can do whatever you want. You are beautiful.” Swooned a bit just then.
Love your site and I didn’t know all of those things about Kelly Slater. I feel a void has now been filled. 🙂
Au Revoir!